Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Seriously, people

Sometimes people send me interesting stories that relate to my never-ending ramblings about men, gender relations and life as a woman. Here are a couple I REALLY needed to share:

Enough to send a lesser woman back home, into bed and under the covers
One of my sorority sisters from college - we'll call her "Pretty and Skinny," or P&S - is a successful single woman rockin New York City. Seriously petite, and super cute, P&S can get away with a lot of clothes that my curves don't allow me to wear. Since they are all the rage, she recently purchased one of those cute little trapeze dresses (see picture below for those of you who don't live for this kind of stuff), and stepped out for a night on the town. She was feeling pretty hot when she walked out of her apartment. She was feeling pretty hot as she waited for the train. She was feeling pretty hot all the way up until she got on the subway and a girl, about the same age, jumped up and immediately OFFERED HER SEAT to P&S.

Horror.

Note to stupid people: if you're not 100 percent sure someone is pregnant, don't make any overt statements or actions suggesting that they are. If you suspect someone might be "with child," simply get up and move to another part of the train, bus or space ship. SERIOUSLY.

http://cdn.overstock.com/images/products/P10757027.jpg

I mock, but if I were him, I might do the exact same thing
My best friend from college, we'll call her BFFC, was recently on a business trip and found herself sitting on the beach in the middle of the night with a male colleague. First, let me just state that this story is probably not going where you think it's going - the man is married (although a little bit skeevy) and BFFC is happily engaged. However, since they both live in the middle of Pennsylvania, they simply shared the desire to take advantage of their close proximity to the beach, regardless of the hour.

As they were sitting there, chatting and enjoying the scenery, BFFC looked down and glimpsed her colleague's bare feet for the first time. THEY WERE FREAKISHLY SMALL. Not "a little on the small side," but "woa, I would never take my shoes off in public." For the rest of the evening, all BFFC could think about was HOW this had POSSIBLY escaped her attention previously.

When they returned to the office and BFFC was able to see her colleague in his work clothes as she normally did, she made it a point to look down and notice his shoes. Mystery solved. His shoes were easily three or four sizes bigger than his feet, and for the first time BFFC noticed that he walked a little funny...and now she knew why.

3 comments:

Bronwyn, said...

It's worse to be thought pregnant when you're just fat - worse still when people no longer assume I'm pregnant maybe? (I'm over 40 now.)

I have a male friendly acquaintance with disproportionately small feet too - but he couples that with long toenails, erk!

Athena said...

yay for sorority sisters like that, I have a good many like that as well (in fact, I'm supposed to room with one in NYC next year). A lot of my friends banned anything babydoll-ish from their closets after that mistake was made a few times.
As for the feet, that's sad.

Anonymous said...

You seriously need to post more often and regularly.